The Expendables 2
(’12 review)

4 outta 5

The problem with the original Expendables, Sylvester Stallone’s mad genius idea of mashing up post-iconic action movie stars, is that it promised a bit too much and also sagged a bit too much.  Expendables 2 manages to be much zipper, move along at a much brisker clip, have better action and spread the wealth around more.  The walk-on cameos of ageing action stars have the good sense to put some firepower into their arms. The movie is very entertaining and jaunts along with a lot of hapless military men who are terrible shots getting mowed down by our heroes.  It’s an enjoyable flick, assuming your conditions for enjoyment involve a lot of large scale violence.  

Once again, Barney Ross (Stallone, who is not directing this time but worked on the script) and his crew of expendable mercenaries are assigned to a dangerous cover-ops mission from Mr. Church (Bruce Willis).  The crew consists of Ross, Christmas (Jason Statham), Gunner (Dolph Lundgren), Hale Caesar (Terry Crews), Toll Road (Randy Colture), new and earnestly idealistic youngster Billy (Liam Hemsworth), and their assigned tech support for the mission, Maggie (Yu Nan).  Unfortunately it all goes pear shaped when the bad guy shows up, Jean Vilain (Jean-Claude Van Damme) and so the expendables have to track him down and save the day.  Which involves a lot of shooting. 

Previous expendable player Jet Li playing the fast-fisted Yang shows up early on and then bounces, which is a shame but the movie keeps things brisk so you don’t notice his absence all that much. Still, even if Li is only in the first extended sequence he still manages to beat the hell out of some people.   Statham probably ate up a bit too much screen-time in the first film, he got saddled with an irritatingly bloated romantic subplot, so he is relegated to mostly a supporting character and is actually better for it.     Actually incorporating some of Lundgren’s real life story into the part, like the actor himself Gunner is a chemical engineer turned bodyguard, Gunner is more of the big comic relief.  Same for Crews and Colture.  Nan gets the more cliché strong token female role but it’s nice to see a woman hold her own in the action sequences and she is at the centre of one of the movie’s surprisingly tense sequences where she has to disarm a bomb while also not being crushed by a giant metal door.  As the younger, greener expendable Hemsworth teeters being a bit too earnest but his exit is handled well. 

As the lead, Stallone basically has to grit on cue and brings a dependable world-weariness as he often does to his later-day characters.  But Sylvester does add a sly sense of humour to the proceedings.  Even though Arnold Schwarzenegger time is limited he’s almost the wacky comedic sidekick whenever he pops up, limited basically to one-liners.  Even his entrance into one scene, chomping on a stogie and saying “I’m back” as if contractually required, is a hoot.  Willis is still snarling a lot and the movie does give 80s action fans what they want by having a scene of Stallone, Schwarzenegger and Willis mowing bad guys down.  There’s even a brief pop up by Chuck Norris as he walks into the movie, blows stuff up, and drops a “Chuck Norris Fact”! 

Van Damme is good a portraying coldly evil, does a decent job at looking like the baddest guy around, and he gets in a villain monologue in at least twice.  There’s even a bit of meta commentary when it looks like the climatic showdown between Stallone and Van Damme is going to be cut short so Van Damme yells “We want our money’s worth!” and proceeds to kick Stallone a lot in the face. 

The movie’s humour self-aware but not parody which is actually a rather delicate tightrope.  This is accomplished through some very energetic action beats.  The opening blows things apart with the expendables riding into a tank-dune buggy chase that rolls through a military encampment as the tanks have names written on them like “Shock and Awe.” The final shoot out between the expendables vs. everybody has lots to recommend.  This is the type of movie where Schwarzenegger can tear a door off a mini car just because he’s so damn manly.  There are moments when the film slows down but when it does it smartly focuses on the banter between the crew.  Director Simon West has a very nicely composed look to the action as he finds cool moments to accentuate.  The bad guy fodder splatter rather nastily but that’s their job.  Entire platoons of gun toting military mercs are gunned down in seconds and in one of the film’s funnier and messier bits the entire expendables crew unloads on a single straggler.  Then somebody quips, naturally.

The Expendables 2 is not a thinking man’s movie, and it may revere the 1980s bygone action hero a bit more than needed, but it’s definitely a step-up from the “Meh-tastic” original.  It actually is the big, crazy shoot-em-up fest that was promised beforehand.  Even the explosions are better! The movie knows what it is and no one seems to be taking it too seriously.  Which is actually a compliment.